insurance is for shit

My MRI that was set up for Sat morning was denied by the insurance company. Oh well, if I don't try to use my arm it doesn't hurt. I've learned how to open the car door with my foot now. I don't carry anything. That should be fun trying to move into another place without carrying anything. But I have some pain medicine, that should help. The Dr is going to appeal that decision but it could take some time.

Have an interview at the Soup Opera next week. For Director. Lots of volunteers and I believe funded by the United Way and donations. Big job, little $ but a whole lot of doing good. It serves one meal a day 365 days a year. About 30,000 meals a year. Also helps with clothing and personal items and more. If they can find a way to increase the salary, it seems it would be a good place to be for a long time.

Process of moving the next couple weeks. Hope its a good place to be for a long time. Altho it is not the Lehigh Valley where I'd rather be, its newly built, close to the highway, light and bright and a resonable price. Hope to be in completely by the 9th. And out of dark and dank Rock Lake home.

Someone called last night interested in Sunny. I didn't know I would have a reaction to letting her go but I have. I hope they give her the love and attention she deserves and that I couldn't/didn't. I just have never been an animal person. Wonder why? Doesn't matter.

Happy Christmas everyone/anyone that reads this, if any do. I have been the laid back one for this holiday, Harold having done most all of the shopping. I'm dragging myself thru trying like hell to get uplifted about it somehow. Its not working. I don't know how to allow all these good and not so good holiday memories and be sad and glad too. I don't want to get out of bed in the mornings but I am. I don't want to go to work but I do. I don't want to talk to anyone but I can, do and try like crazy not to inflict my sorrow on others. Theres no fast forwarding thru this time since Thanksgiving when this began. I want what I cannot have. I want what mistakes I've made to be erased. But thats not the way it works. I hope I have learned something, can pass on a bit so others don't make the same ones or harm as many in their path as I am certain I have. Amends are good. Amends can restore relationships but no amends brings someone back who is gone forever.

But I am sorry for the melancoly.
Do have a happy Christmas and a wonderfully warm and bright new Year.